On January 21, 2011, my life shattered.

My youngest son Bradford, at age 14, committed suicide. Everything I knew regarding the AfterLife came into question. Amnesia set in as a result of the indescribable pain, guilt, and endless, unanswered questions vibrating through every cell in my body. Surviving moment by moment became a way of life, much the same way a terminally ill patient survives each day. Lost in despair, I asked myself, “How do I exist without my son?” My soul felt empty as I dived into an endless abyss.

With the support of loving family, friends, and Divine strength, I gathered whatever courage left in me and focused on re-programming my belief system. Daily I reminded myself that my son was alive, as love transcends the grave. I continued to search for new ways to connect with Bradford and learn new methods to calm my mind.  During this process, The Monroe Institute became a key component in my healing.

Miracles are common occurrences at The Monroe Institute. I am one of them.

In 2014 I attended their foundation program Gateway Voyage. Bradford made his presence known from the first day at the Institute. Through the use of the Hemi-Sync® exercises, the heartfelt support of the participants in my group, and the guidance of the trainers, I began to slowly work on releasing my guilt and fear that consumed my entire being due to Bradford’s physical absence.  I learned to suspend my grief enough to quiet my emotions and connect with Bradford from an awareness level that is beyond my conscious state. In that process, I experienced myself as the eternal being that I am. Robert Monroe’s classic affirmation, “I am more than my physical body. Because I am more than physical matter, I can perceive that which is greater than the physical world …” became my daily mantra.

Since Gateway, I participated in MC² and recently completed Guidelines. Throughout each program, Bradford was present. I have been able to experience my son’s presence from a heightened awareness, looking at the event from a new perspective. With each program I attended, additional layers of suffering, pain, fear, guilt, and intense emotions were released. I learned to travel amongst both worlds, the physical and the spirit world, by expanding my consciousness, understanding that physical death is a portal to our true home. I became emotionally stronger, eliminating any need for years of therapy. The illusion of separateness melted away.

As grieving parents, our journey is heavy, sometimes paralyzing. However, as we acquire new tools and deepen our spiritual knowledge, we can work through our grief by reinforcing the knowing that our child is alive and well, accompanying us in every step we take. As I learned to expand my consciousness and experience deeper connections, hope re-awakened, life became livable, and I now smile at the beauty that surrounds me, while savoring the sweetness of knowing that I will be reunited with my Bradford when my ticket is called, and I sail back home.

Miracles are common occurrences at The Monroe Institute. I am one of them.

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