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August 27

How I Used Meditation to Overcome Panic Disorder

Without overwhelming you with too much backstory, I’d like to talk about how my meditation practice helped me overcome panic disorder back in 2019. 

In December 2018, I traveled to Finland for a vacation. Unfortunately, while in the Arctic Circle, I found myself extremely ill. The sickness completely depleted my appetite, causing me to lose over ten pounds in a single week. Due to the experience of starving, I quickly developed a form of PTSD which, in turn, led to panic disorder. Talk about a long, trying experience.

So, when I would think, “Oh, I’m hungry,” suddenly, and without warning, I would begin having a panic attack pretty much no matter where I was or what I was doing. 

During the months following my return home, whenever I would get hungry, my body would recall the last time I was majorly hungry (which was when I was starving) and decide that it was in danger. So, when I would think, “Oh, I’m hungry,” suddenly, and without warning, I would begin having a panic attack pretty much no matter where I was or what I was doing. 

I knew I had to get used to feeling hungry again and accepting that nothing bad was coming from it. So, I decided to turn to meditation. 

After a couple months of suffering from panic attacks on almost a daily basis, I knew I couldn’t go on living like that. Something had to be done, and I am not a person to turn to medication when I am in these situations. I realized that the only way out was through. I knew I had to get used to feeling hungry again and accepting that nothing bad was coming from it. So, I decided to turn to meditation. 

I set a daily patterning habit that, over the course of a couple additional months, was able to help me overcome my panic disorder. 

I’d put on a peaceful meditation, and I would allow myself to live in that state of hunger from different Monroe Focus levels.

Basically, during those months, when the evening would roll around and dinnertime began approaching, I would actively choose to eat a later dinner. This was to allow my body to get hungry. I needed to feel that discomfort of hunger if I was going to learn to accept and live with it once again. So, I would sit in my bed around 5:30 p.m. or 6 p.m. daily and allow myself to really “feel” hungry. I’d put on a peaceful meditation, and I would allow myself to live in that state of hunger from different Monroe Focus levels. I would allow myself to get hungry, describe to myself how that really felt physically and mentally, and then I would focus on my breath. I would tell myself in my meditation, “You are fine. You are comfortable. You are safe.” It was true. I was in my own bed, in my own home, feeling a state that is normal for a body to feel. I just had to remind my body that this was a safe situation to be in. 

... the Energy Conversion Box helped me with these meditation sessions, as well. I would visualize myself putting my fear and discomfort in the box before each session, and it really did help me throughout this process. 

I found Focus 10 and Focus 12 the two most comfortable Focus levels to be in throughout this process. I can definitely say that the Energy Conversion Box helped me with these meditation sessions, as well. I would visualize myself putting my fear and discomfort in the box before each session, and it really did help me throughout this process.  And I would stay comfortably and peacefully in my bed knowing I was in a safe environment. 

The process was easier said than done. The first couple of weeks, I would regularly start having a panic attack the second I realized I was hungry. But, as I gave myself time and patience, it got easier. The more my body recognized that it could be hungry, and everything would be okay, the more I began to let go and allow myself to feel true peace in a hungry state without having a panic attack. 

My body began to re-learn that hunger was okay. And it began to forget the trauma that was placed on it through starvation. I was able to repattern myself through meditation, and it was a glorious thing. 

Conditioning yourself through such an extreme situation is never easy, and it does take time. It takes patience. And it takes listening to yourself, too. If you find yourself suffering from panic disorder or anything of that nature like I did, I recommend always speaking with your physician first to find out the best course of action. Each person’s situation always has different elements. I am not a doctor, nor do I claim to know medicine. I spoke to the right medical professional for my situation, and together we formed a plan. 

I felt stronger for overcoming something that was extremely difficult.

For my specific situation, meditation really was the best way. And after I came out on the other side of my trauma, I felt like I could take on the world again. I felt stronger for overcoming something that was extremely difficult. And I felt a deeper connection to my higher self that has only grown stronger since. 

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Malorie Mackey

Actress, author and adventurer

Malorie Mackey is an actress, host, and writer living in Los Angeles, CA. Malorie's first book was published in 2017 and her short story "What Love Has Taught Me" has been published in the anthology "Choices.” You can find Malorie’s travel content on dozens of digital media platforms. Check out www.maloriesadventures.com for more. Malorie's adventures don't just encompass physical adventures. She has been a student of intuition since she was a teenager, studying at Edgar Cayce’s A.R.E. In 2019, Malorie discovered the Monroe Institute while filming her travel show. Since then, she has been studying the art and science of consciousness through many different programs and life experiences.