I just completed the Monroe Lucid Dreaming retreat with Luigi Sciambarella and Beth Vaughan. Normally it’s led by the dynamic duo of Thomas Hassenberger and Luigi, but because of travel restrictions Thomas wasn’t able to make it. Nonetheless, Luigi and Beth were wonderful!
The back story
I’ve been trying to take Lucid Dreaming for 3 years, always getting bumped out for paying participants. You see, I’m staff at Monroe and each year we get to choose a program we’d like to take, but if the program fills we, of course, get bumped. It looked like this was going to happen again but, luckily, I was able to squeak in.
Expectations are ALWAYS a barrier to insight.
I went into the program thinking this would be so cool. I’d be staring in my own little twisted mind movies, playing all the parts, performing great feats and slaying all of my demons! I know what my dreams look like, feel like. I have very vivid dreams, normally several a night. I knew they contained messages and meaning that would help me in my awakened state. Basically, I had expectations, which most of us know is the number one barrier to being in the experience. I should know better, right? I’m Monroe staff and this isn’t my first program.
Briefly, my Monroe journey looks like this: I began with Gateway Voyage … mind blown. I’ll leave it there for now. Next, Dowsing … wasn’t ready for another mind-blowing awakening. I just wanted to learn some cool skills. Then came Timeline, only because I got bumped from Lucid Dreaming. THANK YOU, Higher Self, you always know what I need. Timeline literally changed my life. Next, got bumped from Lucid Dreaming again. So, I tried Law of Attraction—a powerful program about the relationship between your thoughts, energy and reality. Now, finally, my persistence paid off and I made it into Lucid Dreaming!
Every program, except for Gateway (I was completely naive going into that program), I had a few expectations based on the program description. But for Lucid Dreaming I had very specific goals. Uh oh, red flag, we know what happens next, and here’s how it went.
Day one, nothing. Day 2, sleep. Day 3, feeling frustrated and disappointed. I gave up, and then it happened. I began exploring and playing with whatever, I got. An image, smell, feeling or full-on scenario. I stopped trying to have the experience as I believed it “should” be, and simply allowed. I followed Luigi’s guidance but also allowed the experiences to morph and shift as it wanted. Journaling, reflecting and sharing my experiences with my fellow Lucid Dreaming explorers helped me to decode some pretty wacky symbols. And there it was—the pot of gold and the end of the rainbow. I began receiving insight and understanding of my subconscious.
Throughout the program, Luigi masterfully led me, us, through the workings of our left- and right-brained communications, reminding us to sit with our feelings and experiences. To explore and allow. You see, at Monroe you find your own meaning.
“You know, surveys show that it is very therapeutic to bridge the conscious and subconscious.” I looked to my left (in the dream) and thought “What? You’ve just interrupted a beautiful moment!”
For example, I had this beautiful experience on day 3, exercise 2, after I finally “gave up” control. The exercise was an invitation to our “dream helper.” We were to invite them into the dream to help us in any way beneficial. My experience/dream began by showing me my life’s repeated outward attempts for unconditional love. I had a feeling of sadness. I knew that I hadn’t been able experience unconditional love through my relationships and I was letting go. Letting go of the hurt, letting go of the pain I was carrying and asking my dream helper to “show me what I needed to know.” My helper came in right away from I don’t know where, and said, “I can introduce you to someone who is eager to give you unconditional love. They have been waiting a long time for you to ask.” I said, “okay.” Taking me by the hand, my dream helper took me to my Higher Self, a nondescript form who radiated and pulsated the deepest, warmest, never ending unconditional love. And as we embraced, I was l filled with love and peace. Then, in a flash, from the left side of my perception, a mustard yellow figure interrupted. Raising his right hand with a finger pointed to the sky as if to make a point he says, “You know, surveys show that it is very therapeutic to bridge the conscious and subconscious.” I looked to my left (in the dream) and thought “What? You’ve just interrupted a beautiful moment!”
After we completed the exercise, we returned to the “Gathering Room” and I shared my experience with Luigi, Beth and the group. Luigi explained that your dream helpers can show up in many ways like pointing out signs, answering questions, even acting as an intermediary. He then also laughed and commented [about the yellow figure] saying, “That’s the left brain feeling left out.”
I began to always be an exercise ahead, which I now at this very moment realize helped fulfilled my analytical skeptical need for validation.
Throughout the remainder of the week, I continued to receive insight, messages and healing. As the week continued to progress, I began to be an exercise ahead, which I now at this very moment realize helped my analytical skeptical need for validation. THANK YOU, again Higher Self for knowing me better than I know myself.
Bridging your conscious and subconsciousness
As with other Monroe programs I’ve taken, Lucid Dreaming proved to be a lot more than I expected. I learned that we are sliding between our conscious and subconscious continually throughout the day, not just in sleep. So, it’s very important to pay attention to your feelings, thoughts and internal dialogue. But, most importantly, I learned how to intentionally use dreams to take back my energy from negative past or current experiences.
Lucid Dreaming was hard work but, after completing the program, I feel an even stronger connection and awareness between my conscious and subconscious mind.